TGIF - Thank god it's Friday. Is it Friday isn't it ? I am losing track of days. I am waking up each morning somewhere between 5am and 6am. This is really late for me, when I was broadcasting 3.30am was when I started my day. Some days now I would be quite happy if I did not wake up again AT ALL - ever.
I am working to launch a writing programme for some of the most vulnerable people in society, I'll tell you more about that in a future page, within which I am telling people it is important not just to write about what has happened in their lives but also how they feel about what has and is happening.
Right now I feel that I am living in a bubble. Every day the wall of the bubble gets stronger. Will the bubble ever burst ? Is the world going to come out of this horror ? If it does when will it escape ? If it does not escape then just when will Armageddon take over completely ?
Inside my bubble I worry about people I know, people I care about. What is happening to them ? As the wall of the bubble gets thicker and I can not see outside I worry more and more.
I believe that our government is doing and amazing job, we need our Prime Minister to get well and back speaking directly every day to the nation. I wish The BBC would adopt a more patriotic and positive approach. When it does celebrate good things I do not feel it does it in a positive enough way. I am a royalist and proud to be but where is our Royal Family ? All we are hearing from them is silence. I think that every day a different member of the Royal Family should be out in the media speaking to and encouraging the nation. What are they doing ? Where are they ?
Last night at eight o'clock I stood outside and clapped. There were people clapping but not enough, I would guess probably 10% of the residents where I live. Somebody was letting off fireworks which I though was special.
Am I frightened ? Yes I am but not for myself, I am very calm about myself but I am frightened for those who are outside my steel bubble, for those I care about and for the world.
I have the TV on right mow and have just seen Boris Johnson, he does not look well, standing on the steps of 10 Downing Street clapping last night. Where was Jeremy Corbyn ? Do you think he was clapping last night ? Where were all of the members of The Royal Family ? How many of then were clapping last night ?
So that's how I am feeling. But what am I doing ? I am trying to find a powerful angle grinder to cut my way out of the steel bubble in order to reach out, touch and help those I know and care about. I will be working all day today trying to cut my way out. Tomorrow I will tell you how I get on.