Destiny you are a devious sod aren't you ! That is not a question it is a statement..
I had my day all planned for yesterday. I was going to the location where I have set my latest story, THE FIRES OF HELL, There I intended to soak up the atmosphere, take some photographs then return home to completely rewrite the opening chapter. The story is not going well so I need to look again.
But that was not your plan was it ?
A family issue took me away from the laptop all day so forcing me to abort my plan. Now I look at what has been happening - Destiny you have been playing chess with me haven't you ? You cunning devious sod !
You don't want me to write THE FIRES OF HELL do you ? Am I to rip it up completely or is it your intention I return to it later in time ?
As you know only too well Destiny, I never write a story direct into my website, I always scribble into an expensive notebook from Poundland then type things up later.
There's the laptop below, there's the expensive £1 notebook and the SECOND pen I used yesterday. Yes one ran out of ink, I wrote so much ! Sorry about the sandwiches, I was feeling hungry.
You maneuvered me didn't you Destiny ? You set me off writing something completely new.
Of all the writing I have done over the years I have never written as much in a single day as I did yesterday. I hit four thousand words.
Jeffrey Archer, bless him, would write two thousand words a day and that has been a target I have always tried to meet. Tried to meet and failed.
The great Mark Twain averaged one thousand four hundred words in a day, something I can usually match. I smashed that number yesterday. The fire brigade almost had to be called as the friction of my cheapo pen on expensive Poundland notepad almost burst into flames.
Are you happy Destiny ? Can I have a merit mark please ?
I really enjoyed writing my schoolboy autobiography THINGS WERE DIFFERENT IN MY DAY. It was fun even if nobody ever wants to read it. I do have it in mind to one day write CARRY ON TEACHER telling of my life in work. One day, it's not high up on the agenda and you are happy with that aren't you Destiny ? But Destiny for goodness sake why ever would I want to write about my two years in an aborted career working in a large department store ?
You've been plotting though haven't you Destiny ? Just as you grabbed me by the shoulders all those years ago and changed the direction of my life, taking me from what I was doing and sending me off along a totally different career path.
Look at Mr Cool aka Yours Truly in 1967. Destiny you unearthed that image from the depths of my parents home and told me to use it as my logo for publishing my scribbling. Yeh it's all over the Internet now. Some people even believe I look like that instead of the ugly old sod I am today.
For the past four months you have been setting out a plan haven't you Destiny ! You want me to go back to my late teenage years and tell the story of those two years.
OK it will be a nice ego trip for me. To please you Destiny I will do it. I will write THE STORY OF A TEENAGE ENTREPRENEUR but I insist on adding the word FAILED in brackets. To keep you happy I have just waved my Visa card at the laptop and purchased www teenageentrepreneur.co.uk. When I have finished typing up all those words from yesterday I will put the draft introduction on-line. Does that make you happy Destiny ?
Destiny you are a sod aren't you ! Hey Destiny any chance I could wake up tomorrow as that arrogant teenager ?
How about sending me back in time so I can do some research for the writing ? Does that sound a good idea to you Destiny ?